I'm Just Like You

I am the mother of three boys. Though I think my boys to be remarkable, all for their own unique reasons, I don’t think I am a particularly remarkable mom. I have good days and bad days. Some days I think do a great job, others I am not a good mom at all. I think that makes me fairly typical. My kids, on the other hand, they are not typical. My oldest has Asperger’s, not something that is immediately apparent just by looking at him. My middle son has Down Syndrome, which is immediately apparent. My youngest, so far only has a serious case of bad-attitude-itis, earning him the nickname Diva, but he does show some of the sensory “quirks” his oldest brother had as a toddler, so the jury is out on whether he falls into the neurotypical camp or not. Having two kids who are different than the standard “norm” certainly presents some challenges that other parents don’t have to face, and we have been though our share of tears and frustration. But at the end of the day, we are just like any other parent. We are proud of our kids’ accomplishments, we hurt when our kids hurt, we get frustrated when their behavior challenges us. So it always catches me off guard, and makes me feel terribly uncomfortable when friends or acquaintances tell me what a great mom I am, or how special I am. They seem to believe that because I have been thrown a few curveballs in having to deal with “special needs” that I am somehow a superior parent. I’m not. Most of the time, I feel wholly inadequate to the task, and think God made a huge mistake by entrusting their care to me. So when people feel like heaping me with praise, I feel like a complete fraud. The truth is, I’m not doing anything that any other mom wouldn’t do. I did not volunteer for this job, it was given to me. So, like any mom would, when illness or emergency or other challenges come, I steel myself, and care for my kids. We all do what we have to in order to keep our kids safe and healthy and happy. My situation may require a bit more energy, and sometimes greater emotional resolve, but I know any other mom would also find the strength they need, if they were in my shoes. It’s what moms do. My kids are special, in many ways and for many reasons. I’m just a mom who loves them more than life itself. Just like most moms.